Every . Friggin' . Day.
I guess I should have known that. It means I will have to get up before noon almost every day. It is a lot. But I will do it for you! My devoted minion - er, I mean followers. We have been through so much together. It's why I'm so awesome.
Important shit for today: (See what I did there? I said "shit". [snicker]).:! ◄Awesome use of punctuation stuff.
- I had a brief conversation with the cat today. She said "Melvin, you think I'm on the naughty list again this year?" I had to give it straight, so I said "Well Puddy, You have killed a lot of innocent creatures this year. And you slapped Kermit and Poot and Camo quite a bit. And you hissed at me and scratched me and bit my finger. Actually you are kind of an asshole, as cats go. So yeah I think you made the naughty list again." "The streak continues" she answered. "Consistency is important to us cats, you know".
- Kermit spoke to me too. He said, "you talkin' to the cat again Melvin?. You realize that is completely insane don't you?". I looked at him and replied, " Yeah. Not like talking to the dog at all."
- Yeah, I talk to my animals. It's not weird. I talk to the little Melvins who live in my head too, but they didn't have a lot to say today.
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