Friday, March 10, 2017

So, me and the cat were sitting around talking last night as people and cats do, when out of the blue he asks the dreaded question that no cat person wants to have to answer. He said "Melven why did they cut my balls off?" I started to lie and say I didn't know anything about it. But I knew that Camo wouldn't buy it. So I said "Camo I did you a favor man." "Do you have any idea how much it costs to throw enough money around to impress a lady cat? To take them out on dates? To buy them stuff? Pay for a wedding and to pay for all those kittens?" He said "Melvin you're such a dumbass. Cats don't have money. All we have to do is be awesome,  which comes naturally for a cat. We do all the partying and you do all the paying. That's why cats are smarter than humans." I thought about that for a minute and then I said in my most ominous tone of voice "I'm glad they cut your balls off." Kermit started howling with laughter like it was the funniest thing he'd ever heard. Camo looked at him and said "what are you laughing at dumbass? They cut your balls off too." Kermit stopped laughing. I'm sleeping with one eye open tonight.

Naughty words :
Balls (in context) 3 times
Dumbass  2 times 

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Go ahead. Say it. I dont care.